Mutual
by Fruityloo
Summary: "In which nothing, from the smallest of pleasures to the deepest devotion, is mutual." one-sided Aido/Kaname, one-sided Kain/Aido. Angstfic. Badfic.


It wasn't love, and it wasn't quite lust, either. Kaname loved Yuki, and all his passion belonged to Zero. Aido was a placeholder, something to occupy the Pure Blood's time while Yuki was busy and Zero was recovering from his last violent tryst with the Pure Blood. When Kaname fucked him, it wasn't out of desire or affection, but a want of distraction, a need for release.

Aido knew this, yet every time Kaname called, he was always quick to follow; always eager to please.

* * *

Aido didn't wait for Kaname to tell him what to do. He already knew; he'd done this so many times before. And by the time the door slide shut behind him, his shirt was already halfway gone; discarded to the floor in one smooth motion. Aido himself didn't know if his haste was a result of anticipation or anxiety; unsure if he was rushing things because he wanted to hurry up and get to the point or if just wanted to hurry and get it over with. He thought it was first one. Why wouldn't it be? Aido knew perfectly well just how good Kaname could make him feel. But then there's the pain it takes to get there. Dgging at his throat, scratching at his chest. Pounding in his ass. Bleeding, throbbing. Needing.

He didn't have a fucking clue.

Luckily, Kaname didn't give him much time to think about. If Aido thought his movements were fast, Kaname's were blinding. In a single movement that even Aido had trouble discerning, his stomach met something cold and hard; unmoving and still. Much unlike himself; he was never still, and – oh! – how he wished he could be cold. But his body was shaking, and even though his mind was blank, Aido still thought far too much to be cold, and– that wasn't the same kind of cold, was it? But no matter. Aido just thought too much.

He was cornered against the wall, but to his left, over the barrier of Kaname's shoulder, Aido could see a fireplace; unlit and cold.

There was pain in his neck. _Cold._

Wet down his chest. _Hot._

* * *

Aido was barely conscious. His neck throbbed, he was bleeding everywhere, and beneath it all there was a constant ache, a deep hunger that went beyond the visceral need for blood. It felt as though he was starving. Starved for blood, starved for love; fleeting sensation of pleasure just barely sustaining him. Hungry. So hungry.

"You may leave," Kaname's voice caressed the inside of his ear, soared above the pain that fogged his mind, the meaning crystal clear even while the rest of him felt as though he was under water. It cut into him like glass, creating a new pain, one that sharpened his senses. Aido longed for the fog to return.

He didn't want to leave. He wanted to stay. He wanted to love. To eat. Blood.

Instead of doing as he was told, Aido crawled closer, closer, until he was practically on top of the Pure Blood. There was no thought for his gross show of disrespect; third erection of the night slapped painfully against his chest. "No," he begged. His disrespectful words and actions still hadn't registered. "Blood. I need blood," God, he needed it so bad. Hungry, so hungry, he wanted –

* * *

_Crack!_

The blow sent him from the bed to the floor.

Pain. Aido tasted blood afresh. His right cheek swelled, nose bursting with pain. It was his punishment: so slight, compared to what Kaname could have done to him. Aido was thankful, and he made sure to say so. But there was no response.

"You may leave," the words are repeated, tone firm and unyielding. This time, Aido obeyed.

* * *

It was late at night when he returned to his dorm – or rather, early in the morning. He was tired, but glad for the late hour. Surely, Kain would not be awake now, and Aido could slip into their room unnoticed, unquestioned. Kain wouldn't have to know what Kaname and his cousin were doing, and he wouldn't have to see the aftermath.

"Good evening, cousin."

Aido jumped at the noise. Of course Kain was awake. It was stupid for him to ever think otherwise.

"E-evening," he stuttered out, and if his activities weren't obvious beforehand, they certainly were now.

"… Go wash up," Kain looked away, and all at once Aido was veryaware of his appearance; his swollen cheek, bloody nose, each and every cut – hidden or visible – on his body.

He wished Kain didn't have to see.

* * *

"I love him," Aido sobbed, and leaned heavily into his cousin's embrace, hiding his face in the crevice of Kain's shoulder as if doing so would somehow make him disappear.

Kain felt something wet stain his shoulder; salty, sweet, innocent tears. "I know," he said softly. What else could he say? Aido was painful and wholly in love with Kaname. Nothing – no matter how badly Kain may want it to be so – could be done about it.

"It hurts," the blonde moaned, clinging even tighter.

"I know," Kaine whispered back – and oh, did he know. It hurt so bad, to love someone so completely, with the constant knowledge that it will never be returned. Wasting so much energy to make him happy and knowing it's all for naught. But it still feelt worth it, to comfort and to care for, even with no hope of recompense.

It really, really hurt.

They stayed like that for a very long time, and when Kain felt fangs at his neck, he was hardly surprised. In fact, he didn't even feel it, wasn't even consciously aware of the teeth until a sick sensation of wetness and warmth began to pool in the crook of his neck where Aido's rested his head.

And even when he was consciously aware of it, Kain made no effort to make Aido stop. He didn't mind bleeding, and he especially didn't mind if it was for his cousin. It was the least he could do.

* * *

**[I am not satisfied with this. At all. I was going for an "incoherent thought process" kind of thing, but even with that being the intent, it still feels awkward, like it doesn't flow right. Maybe because this should have been written in the present tense? but I did not feel like dealing with that, so. Uhm. Enjoy? Yeah.]  
**


End file.
